why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
