Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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