And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize