if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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