did you get engaged???
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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