Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
