So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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