With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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