U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
