Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
