Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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