Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize