Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
