i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
