No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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