she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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