You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
