Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
