doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize