One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
