I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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