I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
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