White coat. Heels.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
