From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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