the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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