id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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