is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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