The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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