dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
