They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
