well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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