I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
