I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize