Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
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just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
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That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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