No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
