there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
