he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize