we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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