okay pat passed out under dana's car
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
