We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
