I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize