yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
