I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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