i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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