I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
