I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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