Texts From Last Night

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am

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  (513): Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am http://tfl.nu/6qjs
  Replies (7) Good night (2160) Bad night (611)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.

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  (832): i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life. http://tfl.nu/zh94
  Replies (51) Good night (4915) Bad night (591)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.

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  (502): Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall. http://tfl.nu/wfv4
  Replies (6) Good night (1008) Bad night (3004)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...

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  (713): I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist... http://tfl.nu/i7x2
  Replies (15) Good night (4862) Bad night (867)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...

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  (703): She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story... http://tfl.nu/gdb4
  Replies (50) Good night (1500) Bad night (4933)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER

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  (203): my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER http://tfl.nu/olos
  Replies (30) Good night (1055) Bad night (5444)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.

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  (901): god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is. http://tfl.nu/53e5
  Replies (29) Good night (4875) Bad night (1489)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.

  (406): View more from Montana

  And we all know God doesn't like sinners.

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Amen.

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  (701): The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out. (406): And we all know God doesn't like sinners. (701): Amen. http://tfl.nu/nq0i
  Replies (14) Good night (6653) Bad night (824)
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  (518): View more from New York

  you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved

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  (518): you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved http://tfl.nu/hfsv
  Replies (15) Good night (4149) Bad night (874)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

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  (505): I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though http://tfl.nu/889i
  Replies (9) Good night (1067) Bad night (2473)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick

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  (304): when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick http://tfl.nu/j5fw
  Replies (22) Good night (5648) Bad night (1120)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.

  (512): View more from Texas

  I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.

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  (512): I feel like someone had their period in my eyes. (512): I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night. http://tfl.nu/gefs
  Replies (8) Good night (658) Bad night (2086)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.

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  (507): I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins. http://tfl.nu/raw5
  Replies (7) Good night (808) Bad night (1089)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Apparently love is stronger than SoCo

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  (719): Apparently love is stronger than SoCo http://tfl.nu/rcou
  Replies (8) Good night (1191) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....

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  (248): It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory.... http://tfl.nu/ewu1
  Replies (4) Good night (451) Bad night (832)

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