Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?