Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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