one might say we're banned from that church
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
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