I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
