Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
