is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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