Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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